A No-Good Very Bad Weekend

I cried more over the weekend then I have in a LONG time. Lacey had a little accident on Saturday afternoon and broke her arm. It makes me so mad because I think about all the times that kids fall off the bed or take a huge tumble down a full flight of stairs and are just fine. Lacey fell down 3, count them, THREE stairs and broke her arm. Both bones in the forarm near the wrist. The doctors didn't even think it was possible because as young as she is, almost all kids get what's called a "greenstem fracture" or something like that because their bones aren't hard yet so it's like a sapling branch that doesn't actually snap when you bend it, it just bows out. But she must have great bones because it broke.

But that's not even the worst part. Yes, it does get worse, and here is where I spent countless hours crying and feeling an ENORMOUS amount of guilt like you have no idea. It's bad enough that she broke her arm, BUT I picked her up and was initially worried about a concussion. I checked her head. Then, I checked her arms and legs, everything looked good. There was nothing jutting out anywhere, nothing bruised, nothing swelling. She seemed TOTALLY fine and I didn't see a need to take her to the ER right away. But I noticed every time she fell, she would erupt into hysterical crying and hold her arm. And she wouldn't use it to push her self up off the floor. But she was playing and using it and moving her fingers and everything else was normal behavior. So I wondered if she sprained it or jammed it or something and decided to watch it. On Sunday, we had a family gathering and she got knocked down by the waitress and other kids SO MANY TIMES. And one horrible little girl INSISTED on holding her hand and twisted it around and she erupted into crying again. The poor little thing cried so much at that party. And I started to worry that something was terribly wrong. By the time I got home, it was nearly her bedtime so I put her down. If I had known what was wrong, I wouldn't have even been there! I wouldn't have let anyone touch her. We would have been at the doctor taking care of her. But I didn't know. How could I have known??? There was no signs of breakage. Everytime I think about the pain she was in when she fell over makes me cry and I just COULD NOT hate myself any more. I started to wonder if it wasn't acutally BROKEN on Saturday and that I had ALLOWED all those horrible people to break it on Sunday at that party. I just couldnt even forgive myself for not protecting her better.

So Monday morning, when it had started to swell from all the Sunday activities, I took her to the ER and even they said that nothing looked abnormal. They figured maybe a sprain or something. But it was on the Xray. She's really was taking the whole giant bandage thing as well as she can but sometimes she really wants it off and it's so hard for me. Yesterday, she went to the orthopedist to check it out. They decided a cast "would just be torture for everyone" when it came time to take it off. So he did a new (and far less bulky) splint for her. She is much happier with it and has much better use of her fingers and elbow. And we can fit it through the arm holes of her clothes better too. We go back to check it out in just over 2 weeks. June 15th.

I can't even put into words how horrible I felt. I just don't think there are any. I don't think I would have felt nearly as bad if I hadn't put her in further harm's way at that stupid party on Sunday. But hindsight is 20/20 and she will be just fine. I'm already feeling a little better about the situation and things are looking up. I will keep you all informed.