Just when I think I know my daughter, she changes her style. Could this be the dreaded separation anxiety stage? Her first day back to school was on Tuesday and she was perfectly fine. All of a sudden on Wednesday morning, she threw a fit that I was leaving her at daycare. She wouldn't let me put her down on the floor. Every time I tried, she would grab hold of my neck and paw at me and bury her head in my legs crying. I had to leave her there. They said she did that every time her teacher left to go to the bathroom too. But I wondered if it was just that she wasn't feeling very well or if maybe she was just particularly clingy. But she did the same routine this morning as well. Cried her little heart out. Even at home, she only wants to be with me, play with me, and be in my arms the entire time. Then she wants down, only to then be angry that I put her down. So she has been doing a lot of pitiful crying for the last couple of days.
Also, it has come to my attention that she understands something very important. Sleep. It has been difficult to get her to go to sleep lately in the way that we have done for so long. Now, when we rock, she insists on playing with my face, pulling my hair, contorting her little body to wriggle out of my arms, throwing in some fits of crying and protesting. It has taken over an hour to get her to sleep most nights this week. And now I know why. She knows and understands that I am asking her to go to sleep and she absolutely does not like that idea at all. I had an inkling a couple of days ago but it was confirmed at her evening nap yesterday. I said to her "OK Lacey, it's time to take a nap" which happens to be the same phrase I use all the time. I went to give her the binky and she threw herself backwards in a fit of rage and flailed her arms around. My lightbulb went on. This means that I can now take a different approach.
I had been trying this very lightly for 2 days...putting her in the crib awake to see what she did. Sometimes, she would drift off to sleep with some patting. Sometimes, she would cry and I would have to pick her up. But armed with my new realization, I put her in the crib sleepy, but awake, for this nap. I stayed right over her and patted and forced her back into a laying position a couple of times and she gave up and went to sleep. AHA! So last night as she was again struggling against my rocking, I put her in the crib. But she absolutely would not stay still and stood up time and time again. So I kissed her little head, said "Nighty Night Booboo", and walked right out of the room. She cried on and off for about 15 minutes and went to sleep. She slept all night long. And now that I have announced this success, it will not work tonight.
Lastly, she throws tantrums. I can only assume that she either learned this from the kids at daycare or every kid realizes this technique at some point on their own. I don't know. But everything in her world is devastating and requires a total meltdown. Now, this isn't exactly new. She's been perfecting her craft for several weeks now. What's new is that it now involves hitting. If she gets angry while I am holding her, she erupts into howling and then frowns at me and flails her arms at my face deliberately hitting me. Then when I tell her firmly "No Hitting", the tears flow. (Sigh) Isn't it too soon for this?? What happened to my sweet little baby??
Thursday, January 05, 2006
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2 comments:
I have been running into the same issues with Dean. Is this "new" approach still working?
Which isseus are you referring to, the sleep? Yes, that is working. Now, we put her in the crib and leave and she goes to sleep by herself pretty much.
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